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Friday, August 09, 2002
there's this jug they gave me at the hospital, that i'm supposed to pee in for 24 hrs. actually there's a warning label on the side that says not to "void" directly into the jug because it contains acid that can burn skin. this i get to keep in the refrigerator. yay! no, that's not lemonade or crystal light! aaarrrrgggghhhh! the roomate is thrilled. he brought home a full sized coke machine last night. i'm supposed to design some cool buttons for it and maybe decorate the lighted area with x-rays and stuff. hmmmm... Better call the doctor....3: From: Dolly(X) Subj: Msg: Probably not heading south tonight. I'm leaking 18:56:02 09/04/02 Thursday, August 08, 2002
here's some fun for the telephonically inclined..... The numbers in parentheses preceding each one lined song corresponds to the contributor from the listing at the end of the file. Key to symbology: Commas (,) pauses Hyphens (-) held notes -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- -=-###-=-Mary Had A Little Lamb-=-###-=- (2) 3212333,222,133,212333322321 or 3212333,222,133,3212333322321 or (3) 3212333,222,399,3212333322321 -=-###-=-Jingle Bells-=-###-=- (4) 333,333,39123,666-663333322329,333,333,39123,666-6633,399621 or (3) 333,333,39123,666,6633,3332232,9,333,333,39123,666,66333399621 -=-###-=-Frere Jacques-=-###-=- (4) 1231,1231,369,369,9*9631,9*9631,111,111 or (6) 4564,4564,69#,69#,#*#964,#*#964,414,414 -=-###-=-Olympic Fanfare-=-###-=- (4) 3-9-91231,2222-32112312,3-9-91231,2222-32112321 -=-###-=-The Butterfly Song-=-###-=- (4) 963,23621,3693236236932362,963,23621 -=-###-=-Happy Birthday-=-###-=- (5) 112,163,112,196,110,8521,008,121 -=-###-=-Generic Arabian tune-=-###-=- (1) 453 54 4569564 459 9#95458 8987 453 54 -=-###-=-Way Down Upon the Swanee River-=-###-=- (7) 321321045,6842,321321945,654224 -=-###-=-Auld Lang Syne-=-###-=- (7) 8444684891439# -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Contributers (1) rdippold@qualcomm.com (Ron "Asbestos" Dippold) (2) recycler@maple.circa.ufl.edu (3) rt@boi.hp.com (Robert Tadlock) (4) antang@phakt.usc.edu (Tony) (5) tina@utkvx.bitnet (Tina R. Jones) (6) pchaos!keithm@pail.rain.com (Keith Maddock) (7) dan@fch.wimsey.bc.ca (Daniel Fandrich) -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Contribution Guidelines Send only new entries or variations on the songs above. Use commas for pauses, hyphens for holds. If you need to use new characters for instructions, please explain them. Send to : pchaos!keithm@pail.rain.com -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- This humor courtesy of The Laffatorium (www.pagesz.net/~joe/welcome.html) Wednesday, August 07, 2002
i test drove the b.p. med just before dinner with my brother. i feel nothing. lethargic maybe. took my bp after dinner and it was 126/82. just what the dr. wants, but can i drive on it. apparently i can - i made it home. the question is... can i work under its evil influence. guess i find out tomorrow. i'll have to post a warning outside my cube. danger! danger! acclimating to new meds! beware! today i've given 2 urine samples, been poked, prodded, and ultra-sounded. it's a girl! maybe it is, maybe it isn't. these nurses aren't talking. "the dr. has to give you the results, but i'm sure there's nothing to worry about...." we've heard that before. i gave up some blood today too. i asked the guy if he was the chief phlebotomist and he just stared at me. then he handed me some packets - moist towelettes. i've still got them, and have no idea what i was supposed to do with them. there was soap in the bathroom and junk. oh well. missed being at work, and according to FC was missed as well. what did puppy boy do without the graham crackers? mojo sounds like the test master. Monday, August 05, 2002
this morning i dreamed of an ex-coworker. female. tall. naked. with black lines drawn all down the front of her, like she was prepped for cosmetic surgery. i blame this on my researching of dismorphia this weekend. i had this dream about highway 6. i was riding my bike before work. i must have changed shifts because i didn't have to be there until 4pm. i heard sirens and pulled into a gas station/rest area. the terrain was very flat and it was a clear day. i thought to myself that i must be at the canadian border or somewhere in california. i could just see forever. this was strange i thought, because it was a mostly uphill ride all the way there. anyway, i get inside and they asked if i had heard the sirens. i said yes and they explained that this huge machine was about to come up the road and it cleared everything in it's path. it was led in by smaller vehicles spraying water and such. they said that i would have to stay there until it passed. i checked the clock and it was about 3. i started thinking that i should find a phone and call in for some personal time as i didn't want to be counted late. i tried one payphone and there were crossed lines, couldn't dial out. i wondered if that machine took out some phone poles in it's wake. i went down a hill to the restrooms and they were clearly marked. i locked the door behind me. in spite of this, the "girl" from the gas station walked in on me. i started yelling something about privacy, when much to my horror she whipped her's out and started peeing as well. what a picture of wrongness! i RUN. i end up in this pseudo park and i'm trying to use a payphone built into the water fountain. no luck. i go into what looks like a clubhouse for an apartment complex and start looking for a phone. well, there's a phone cord running to the sink. i tug at it and it seems the sink stopper IS the phone. i brush away some food/garbage and there's the dial, covered in strawberry muck. some of the buttons are missing, so again, no luck. i decide to get my bike and try to call when i get home. on the way back down the highway i noticed cars that have been swept to the side and a caveman trapped in a block of ice. no dear reader, i don't get it either. i run into my mom, who is walking and/or jogging. she offers to let me use her cell phone after i explain that i need to call work. she has some kind of speed dial on it and it keeps trying to second guess what i'm dialing. so again, no call. when i get home dad is mad because i was back talking some guy that kept placing obscene phone calls to a payphone that my brother kept answering. apparently mr. creepoid was making calls to the payphone on his break at work. i answered that payphone and was so perverted back to the guy that he hung up. you would think dad would be proud! anyway, it's late and i should get ready for work. i'll avoid highway 6 if it presents itself.... |