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Saturday, April 13, 2002
BonanzaA guide to the characters"Pa"  Intelligent, witty, honest, and approximately 630 years old, he is the owner of the Ponderosa, which is a ranch occupying an area larger than the state of Connecticut. No one is sure how he could afford this land, or how he and his boys can keep order of so much land, but somehow this is managed. It seems to be forgotten that at the speed of horses, it would take 3-4 DAYS to get from one end of the ranch to the other. But heck, everyone needs their elbow room, RIGHT? Pa shows so much trust and respect for his sons that he let's them make choices of their own on every day matters, as long as they do EVERYTHING that he says. After all, we can't give the "youngins" too much free room, until they are aged real proper like.... "Oldest Son"  The oldest son says nothing. He is quiet, resourceful, and secretely a heroin addict who goes by the street name of Jay-Zee. Talk about scary. "Middle Aged Son"  Slow and stupid, this boy wa obviously kicked in the head by a bull when he was still a child. He has the personality of sewage, and seems to exist only to throw punches. "Youngest Son"  Loud mouthed and boisterous, he would sell his family out for a roll in the hay with the town prostitute. Excercises the good judgment of a 5 year old, and never lets thinking get in the way of anything.... "Huggy Bear"  Token Black Man, he runs a bar, and helps Pa with his street smart knowledge. He has ties to the underworld, and his rapier wit and smooth style make him the obvious choice for underworld information. "Tonto"  Token Indian dude. Speaks broken english, and seems grateful that his entire family is being made to march to a small scrap of land in Oaklahoma. He hopes to someday own his own exempt gaming casino. Don't get too attached, he and Huggy Bear (see above) will be guaranteed to be killed by the second commercial break... Friday, April 12, 2002
it's friday! yay! i'm going to wear my despair.com shirt to work. pbzzzt! still attempting to black out in class. i think my bp is low. woke up today to find an order for a $20 book. i love selling books while i'm sleeping. makes me feel like an infomercial. however, given my job responsibilities isbns are no fun in the morning. matched a microsoft book in my collection with their order, but the description doesn't jive. this book never had a cd. they want an nt resource guide, and this is an internet guide. did you know that everything ibm makes has a part number? even back pillows and towels. scary. book sale is tomorry, then the stuckey's excursion. i'll share the experience of both when i get back. i am a cranky shit today. i wish i had silver pigs on my mud flaps. some days you just know there's gonna be a body count before it's all over. there's no room in the fridge to put my lunch. this whole thing about friday and things being thrown away - lie - all of it lies! doom doom doom doomie doom doom. i got grass seed scattered last night and raked and planted stuff last night. someone just said that we get to go over forms and procedures today. sounds like tedious crap. i think if i feel like blacking out today i'm just going to go with it. no fighting it, just gonna fall back into the dark embrace. someone wake me for lunch. Wednesday, April 10, 2002
um, does what happen often? the enabling? sounds like the title of an IFC type movie. the link worked for me. asked it all kinds of questions. asked if our trainer was ever going to show up: no, am i in the right job?: yes, is my supervisor out to get me?: yes, are we getting out early today?: no. i'd like to hijack the app and change the responses to something darker. how about "don't leave your cube", "duck!", "certain death", "not a chance", "kill yourself", "not worth it", "he hates you", "painful", etc.my friends and their cars seem to set on self destruct. hope training is more interesting today. yesterday i kept blacking out. i tried to go to that happy place in my head but it was closed for cleaning and repairs. it's not that the material was boring, or the trainer. i'm just getting training burn out. this is our 6th week. evil ex-roomate is coming to the house again tonight. guess i'll go wash and clean out the car in anticipation of saturday's roadtrip. doing the book sale and then off to stuckey's! post here if you want a fortune telling fish or pecan log. Am I an ENABLER ??????Enabling - Offering the Wrong Kind of Help.Enabling is rescuing your loved ones so that they do not experience the painful consequences of their irresponsible decisions. Enabling is anything that stands in the way of persons experiencing the natural consequences of their own behavior. Tracy, the young mother of two boys, has mastered the art of manipulating her family into enabling her behavior. Often arrested on drug charges, she would say to her parents, "Do you want to see the mother of your grandchildrwen locked up in jail?" The last time it happened , the parents were planning to mortgage their home so they could afford the bail payment. Galatians 6:7-8 speaks to Christians about this with a simple but blunt truth. "Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from tha Spirit will reap eternal life."(NIV) God's Word is specific. Christians - don't be deceived! Bad actions have painful consequences, even when our children or loved ones are involved. Thankfully, God can use those consequences for His purposes - if we don't get His way. When you stop enabling, get ready for more trouble!When you stop offering the wrong kind of help, your loved ones may get very angry with you - and for a "good" reason. You’ve stopped rescuing them. Now they are beginning to feel the painful consequences of their irresponsible decisions. Just before mortgaging their home, Tracy’s parents were persuaded to stop enabling her. They let her stay in jail for almost a year - feeling the full impact of her irresponsible behavior. Angry and frustrated, Tracy accused them of not loving her. But while she was in jail, the drugs cleared out of Tracy’s system and she began to think clearly again. She joined a Bible study, became a Christian and entered Teen Challeng when she was released. When you make a decision to stop enabling like Tracy’s parents did, you must stand on the facts - especially if you have a tender heart. You must continue to rehearse the fact of how your loved one’s actions are destroying his or her life - and how enabling this to continue is the worst thing you could do. God is a loving Father - don’t be afraid to trust Him.When you stop enabling your loved one, he or she may go further down the path of destruction. You may inwardly think, "I can’t bear to see my daughter in such pain and danger." Or, "My son might get killed! And then I would his death on my hands. I can’t let that happen!" But whatever happens, do not be afraid to trust God. Place your hope in the story of the Prodigal Son recorded in Luke 15. This father did not enable his son. He allowed him to leave home, knowing the son would soon waste his inheritance. Before long, the rebellious young man had lost everything - and he ended up in a pig pen, eating the food the pigs didn’t want. But all alone in the pig pen, the Bible says, "He came to his senses." The young man realized that even the hired men on his father’s family ate better than he did! And the son resolved to go and seek his father’s forgiveness. When he finally meets his father again, the son’s true repentance is seen in his words: "Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you." (Verse 21) He takes personal responsibility for his actions. It’s time for joyful peace and a celebration! Tuesday, April 09, 2002
just sold that planchette that killed my car. lady gave me $20 for it. i did some checking and apparently it dates back to 1910. there's a collector online that has one. you can view her collection here that's the one i have on the top row. i might have been able to get more, but i'll settle for the $20. booksale on saturday and all. time to fetch toasty clothes from the dryer and go out into the rising damp. Monday, April 08, 2002
i had this dream over the weekend where i was obsessed with having a nice looking lawn. i dug, tilled, fertilized, raked, and watered. then i realized that all this work was being done on a plot of dirt in a basement. 4 walls, one small window, and no chance of much light. what does it all mean?? last night i think the car's computer was showing signs of senility. the locks automatically lock when the it's put in gear, but they kept "twitching" - trying to lock again when the car was in motion. i shall start referring to it as rameses the III, kerplop, kerplop, kerplop, whoops! where's my thwibble? Sunday, April 07, 2002
today matt and i went to old indiana fun park. yes, it's still there. in pieces. mostly it's a dumping ground for 6 flags. old rides, roller coasters, log flume. it wasn't too hard to find, tho the light poles mentioned on Lost Indiana are not as visible as we thought they would be. the poles must have been there when they wrote the article. now there are just the concrete bases. next week we hope to visit 1 of 2 open Stuckey's in indiana. probably the one off 70 on the way to richmond. wonder if they still sell those pecan logs and goofy souvenirs. |